Kids - Stealing Cheese Crackers

Wilder came home very upset the other day. He told me a new classmate had stolen his cheese crackers that he packed for snack that morning. These are not just basic cheese crackers, my son would DIE for these. They are Cheez-its Duoz-- cheddar and parmesan and he loves cheese. Anything cheese. If I want him to eat something I just put cheese on it. Anyway, he plopped in the car after school ferocious and grumpy. Like he saved it for me! the affront would have happened about 6 hours before I picked him up. Lucky ma, am I, that he saves his grumps for me. We talked a bit, and I asked why he thought this young fella was the guilty one. He said it was because he was "mean. " Knowing that it has taken Wilder a good three months to get a playdate goin' this is not a particularly outgoing school. This new boy has only been present a week and may not have any friends yet. Wilder assured me that he did, and, that he himself was one of them! (Boys~~) I mentioned that sometimes kids are "mean" to defend themselves... if they are unsure, or fearful, or maybe that is all they saw modeled at home.
Wilder came home today and said that he asked this new boy why he was mean. The fellow answered that the kids here were very mean to him. And then he told Wilder that he moved here from California and is in foster care.
There are many reasons that people are unreasonable, rude, or 'mean'. They may just be unreasonable, rude and mean people, or there may be a reason that is not readily apparent.
Sometimes it pays to extend that graciousness to those that you misunderstand.