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blueshoefarm at gmail dot com.... and that would be how to reach me

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Easy Surgery

Friday I went in and out of the hospital for my tumor killin' event.  I was giddy before the procedure and giddy after, although the after was probably affected by all the drugs they were shooting in my IV.
The doctors said the after effects of my gamma ray treatment would be exhaustion, and my experience with exhaustion after a brain trauma is of course, the way I felt after the stroke.  Dang tired. Bone numbing exhaustion.  So I thought this would be like that without the body idiosyncracies, balance issues, and weakness. This is nothing like that-- I feel pretty normal with no exhaustion.  The only residual effect is a botox looking forhead from the local anaesthesia they used to attached the pins in my cranium.  The grossest part according to my friend who took me and actually watched.
I am now in a suite hotel with three tv's and a kitchen, king size bed, watching cable tv (a big deal since we don't have tv at my house, we watch everything on hulu) getting spoiled by friends.

In a year with a stroke and tumor, I feel very, very lucky.  That I seem to be coming out of these physical traumas relatively unscathed.  Sometimes you look for a explanations, reasons, a cause,  to understand.  But I am realizing sometimes there are none, this is just the way our lives can roll.  You can reach toward faith, family, religion to try to make you feel in control, like there is a reason or a master plan why funky stuff happens.  Whatever works for a person and makes them able to handle their fears and anxiety is a wonderful road to head down.  I headed down many avenues to find answers and I can't say there was any one solution for me.  But I learned a lot.

Funny during the season of family and friends I am bluntly reminded about what is important. I know this will make me a better friend, since I am seeing the best side of my loved ones.  I hope I never have to reciprocate what they have done, but at least now I know how to do it with grace and selflessness.  Maybe my blog is aptly named.


Karen Anne said...

Very glad to hear that.

Jayne said...

I'm glad things went well for you. I love your outlook on life.

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